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The Problem of Pain and A Grief Observed

January 14, 2011

I am a huge fan of C.S. Lewis. Many of you may be familiar with his children’s stories, “The Chronicles of Narnia.” I can still remember the excitement I felt reading “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” for the first time. I was in third grade. After reading for hours, my mother told me it was time to go to bed. So I read with a flashlight underneath my covers. Ever since then, I have been drawn to Lewis’ work. And today I would like to discuss two of them; “The Problem of Pain,” written in 1940, and “A Grief Observed” in 1961.

Lewis was no stranger to pain when he wrote “The Problem of Pain.” His mother died when he was nine years old. He was wounded in the trenches during WWI. His father died when Lewis was a young man in 1929. He knew what it was like to experience pain, so when he was asked to address this topic, he asked for a caveat. He claimed and I quote, “the only purpose of the book is to solve the intellectual problem raised by suffering; for the far higher task of teaching fortitude and patience I was never fool enough to suppose myself qualified, nor have I anything to offer my readers except my conviction that when pain is to be borne, a little courage helps more than much knowledge, a little sympathy more than much courage, and the least tincture of the love of God more than all” (Preface). The rest of the book goes on to explain why we experience suffering and pain. He essentially says that pain is God’s megaphone that He uses to get through to us when we need to learn how to rely on Him. It is a valiant effort, and much can be learned, but it is not very helpful for those who are in the midst of pain, grief, or suffering. This book addresses the head rather than the heart.

Two decades later. Lewis experienced the loss of his wife, as well as the deterioration of his own health. “A Grief Observed” records his struggle following the death of his wife. I would like to share a few snippets from the book that I have found to be helpful. It is my hope that by listening to one man’s experience of pain and loss we might all receive some comfort that we are not alone in our suffering.

At times Lewis felt as if God had abandoned him. He no longer saw pain as God’s megaphone to make us turn to him. He asks,

“Where is God? This is one of the most disquieting symptoms. When you are happy, so happy that you have no sense of needing Him, so happy that you are tempted to feel His claims upon you as an interruption, if you remember yourself and turn to Him with gratitude and praise, you will be—or so it feels—welcomed with open arms. But go to Him when your need is desperate, when all other help is vain, and what do you find? A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double bolting on the inside. After that, silence…. Why is God so present a commander in our time of prosperity and so very absent a help in time of trouble?” (5).

Psalm 13 says it this way, “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” Sometimes it feels as if God is absent when we are in the midst of pain, grief, or suffering.

Lewis goes on to express his anger with God about the loss of his wife by asking how we know if our loved ones are really in a better place. He imagines someone saying that we know that our loved ones are in a better place because they are in God’s hands. To which he replies,

“But if so, [my wife] was in God’s hand all the time, and I have seen what they did to her here. Do they suddenly become gentler to us the moment we are out of the body? And if so, why? If God’s goodness is inconsistent with hurting us, then either God is not good or there is no God: for in the only life we know He hurts us beyond our worst fears and beyond all we can imagine. If it is consistent with hurting us, then He may hurt us after death as unendurably as before it. Sometimes it is hard not to say, “God forgive God.” Sometimes it is hard to say so much. But if our faith is true, He didn’t. He crucified Him.” (31).

Lewis questions how God can allow bad things to happen to good people, but also recognizes that God knows what it is like to suffer. While we may not be able to explain why bad things happen to good people, we can trust that we do not suffer alone. Our God knows what it is like to suffer. Through the power of the Holy Spirit we are not alone in our suffering. Christ came to live with us, die for us and he rose again so that we might be with God both now and forever. We have hope because someday, “God will wipe away every tear from [our] eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away” (Revelation 21:4).

Toward the end of the book, Lewis says,

“I have gradually been coming to feel that the door is no longer shut and bolted. Was it my own frantic need that slammed it in my face? The time when there is nothing at all in your soul except a cry for help may be just the time when God can’t give it: you are like the drowning man who can’t be helped because he clutches and grabs. Perhaps your own reiterated cries deafen you to the voice you hoped to hear” (53-54).

Psalm 13 says it this way, “But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.”After all is said and done, there is no adequate answer for all of the pain we are experiencing. It is good for us to try to wrap our heads around the “Problem of Pain,” but it is more important for us to open our hearts to “A Grief Observed.”

Please pray with me,

Gracious God,

We do not always understand your ways, but we trust in you. We do not always know why certain things happen, but we trust that you are with us. God, help us when we are unable to trust. Help us when answers do not come. When we are in pain, we ask that you would surround us with those who love us and care for us. Make your presence known to us, especially when we suffer. God, we ask that you would ease the pain of those who are suffering this day. Comfort those who are mourning. Support those who are caring for others. Bless us all and help us to be a blessing to others. Amen.

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The Word in 3-D (originally appeared in Pampa News "Good Word" Column)

July 6, 2010

3-D movies are back!  After watching Avatar, it is safe to say that the 3-D experience is bigger and better than ever before.  Wanting to share the joy of watching a movie in “eye-popping” 3-D, I recently took my two older children to watch their first 3-D movie.  Within minutes they took off their adult-sized glasses and refused to put them back on.  This meant that the images they saw on the screen were blurry.  Since this is a religious column titled “The Good Word,” let’s use the 3-D experience as a metaphor for the Word of God, much like the Psalmist used a lamp to describe God’s Word in Psalm 119:105.  Imagine that the screen is our lives and the 3-D glasses are the Word of God. When you look at the screen without the glasses the images are blurry and give you a headache, but when you look at them through the glasses everything becomes clear and the headache goes away.  When you look at your life without the Word of God everything seems to be messy and can lead to more than a headache, but when you look at your life through the Word of God, you begin to see things clearly.  While the glasses help you see things more clearly, some (like my children) refuse to wear them, just as some refuse to use the Word of God to help them see God, themselves, and the world more clearly. 

           As a Presbyterian minister, I have studied the works of John Calvin at length.  John Calvin wrote his “Institutes on Christian Religion” to help ministers better understand and teach scripture.  In the Institutes, Calvin suggested that Scripture was like a pair of glasses that helps those with blurred vision see the world more clearly.  Our vision of the world is blurred by sin, so God has given us his Word to help us better understand who God is and who God is calling us to be.  We can either use the Word to see the world more clearly, or we can refuse to be aided by the Word and look at the world with our own blurred vision.
 
            The Bible tells the story of God’s saving action in the world. It is made up of a collection of different books written by different people in different styles and in different times. These multiple perspectives provide a link with a postmodern society that values multiple perspectives and promotes relativism.  While we do not buy into society’s claim that “it’s all relative” or “I’m good, you’re good, it’s all good,” we do recognize that each of us has a unique experience of God and that we are called to value each person and their life experiences.  Because we value people as individuals we are called to share the Word with them as we invite them to see how their story connects with God’s story.  Christians should not shy away from, but be eager to engage in discussions about questions of faith, personal experience, and truth claims.

            The Spirit enables us to see God at work in the world.  When we look at life through the lens of faith, we begin to see where society is seeking Christ and where Christ is already at work.  Our music, movies, and television shows often include or engage Christian imagery, biblical allusions, and life applications.  Sometimes these references or themes promote, blur, or conflict with the Word.  We need to prayerfully consider how we can use music, movies, and television to engage in conversations that are honest, relevant, and faithful.  We need to seek opportunities to engage in faithful discussions that will allow us to share the “Good Word” with others.  After all, the Word is like a pair of 3-D glasses that helps us see things more clearly and helps alleviate the headaches in life.

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Ticket to Ride

June 10, 2010

Ticket to RideThis past week Jennifer and I went to train the staff for the Palo Duro Presbytery Summer Camp program at Buffalo Gap. While we were there I had a chance to play the boardgame that my in-laws got me for my birthday. The game is called Ticket to Ride and the objective of the game is to finish with the most points. You earn points by collecting train cards that allow you to place your colored plastic trains on the tracks. You also get points if you successfully connect the cities that are on your tickets. As I played the game with some of the counselors, many of whom were members of the church where I worked as a Youth Director, I couldn't help but compare our lives to the game.

Sometimes others try to cut us off and keep us from where we are going. For some reason, some people feel it is necessary to stop others from achieving their goals in order to achieve their own.

In some cases, our paths cross, never to cross again. In other cases, our paths continue to cross, sometimes in the most unlikely places. And still in other cases, we seem to travel next to each other and even though we might veer away from one another here or there, we always seem to come back together. Some of the relationships we form are special for a while and then they fizzle. Some are fun to keep tabs on. And some are meant to be lived side by side. Isn't it wonderful how God places all kinds of different people in our lives.

As I played I couldn't help but try to figure out where the other players were going. Which reminded me of a scripture passage. In the gospel of John, Jesus appears to some of the disciples early in the morning after they had been fishing all night. After Jesus tells them where to get the fish and they enjoy a fish fry for breakfast, Jesus talks with Peter. Peter had denied knowing Jesus three times, so Peter asks him if he loves him three times. Each time Peter says yes and Jesus tells him to take care of his sheep. Then Jesus implies that Peter will die a terrible death. And then the gospel says, "Peter turned around and saw behind them the disciple Jesus loved... and Peter asked Jesus, 'What about him Lord?'" Jesus tells him not to worry about others. He says, "As for you, follow me." In the game of life, we shouldn't spend so much time worrying about what God has in store for others, we should simply follow Jesus and take care of his sheep.

So the question is, where is Jesus calling you to go? Who are you supposed to take care of?Ticket to Ride

During the game I would sometimes have to adjust what I was doing in order to get where I was supposed to go. Sometimes I made it and other times I didn't. I suppose the same is true in life. Sometimes we need to make adjustments in order to get where we want to go. Sometimes we will make it and sometimes we won't. But sometimes the journey is more important than the destination. And when it comes to our ultimate destination... we are in good hands.

In the game, you know where you are supposed to go and you try to get there. In faith, we know where we are supposed to go and we know there is no way we can get there. We have been blocked in on every side. But thanks be to God, that the maker has made a way for us to win in the end. Thanks be to God that someday we will be together with God and be able to see all the connections that God was able to make in us and through us.

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There's An App For That!

May 25, 2010

Jennifer and I purchased iphones the day before Grayson was born. When we got them, I thought they would be cool, but I had no idea how cool they are. There really is an app for just about everything. I started running recently and there is a great app that tells me my time, distance, and pace. I was also able to sync my email, calendar, and tasks from my new computer and iphone. I also recently started playing chess on my iphone - I can woop the computer when I set it on a low setting, but when I increase it's "intelligence" I either run out of time or lose. One of our friends said that getting an iphone was lifechanging - while I won't go that far - it has made a lot of things easier and more interesting.
So I was wondering - for those of you that have an iphone - what apps do you use most? 
And for those of you who don't have iphones - they just knocked $100 off the price at Walmart (according to my good friend who just so happens to be the store manager at our local Walmart)

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New Computer – Perhaps Some New Posts Soon

May 22, 2010

I got a new computer for work and it has a handy gadget on the desktop that takes you right to your blog.  So perhaps I will begin writing regularly.  If you would be interested in hearing some of my thoughts on a blog, please let me know by leaving a comment.  Thanks,

Kenny

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Caiaphas (Taken from drcrilley.blogspot.com)

February 28, 2010

I recently heard a preacher say that if a preacher disagrees with something another preacher says, then you will hear all about it on their blog. This same preacher says that if a preacher loves what another preacher says, then you will you will hear it when they preach it in their sermon this Sunday. Well, I won't be preaching on Caiaphas this Sunday, but I love what Dr. Crilley has to say about him in his most recent post. If you don't follow drcrilley.blogspot.com, you should start now - but don't be surprised if some of the material sounds familiar when I preach it sometime down the road. 

History tells us that Caiaphas was the high priest of the Jewish Sanhedrin between the years AD 18 and 37. He was appointed by Valerius Gratus, the Roman governor prior to Pontius Pilate; and the primary reason that Caiaphas was able to hold on to the position for close to two decades is that he did exactly what was expected of him.

Basically, his job was to ensure that everything continued running as smoothly as possible: first, so that Jews stayed out of jail and off crosses, and second, because there were some clear advantages to cooperating with Rome. The roads were easier to travel, the streets safer at night, and having Roman troops at every corner obviously kept Israel from being invaded by anybody else!

True, the taxes were terrible; and no one really enjoyed living in an occupied territory. But the cost of challenging Caesar’s authority was considerably higher than the cost of compromising with him. You know the old saying—“If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.”

And for most of the year, this forced alliance worked just fine. People may have grumbled about the Romans, but they usually did so under their breath and out of earshot of the soldiers. Passover was the only time when things could get a little dicey because of course, Passover was the celebration of Israel’s dramatic release from captivity, and it never took much to remind folks that release from captivity was still the number one priority.

So when the high priest heard reports of an itinerant Galilean preacher named Jesus, who was stirring up the people, and who was making his way toward Jerusalem for the Passover, Caiaphas’ mind went into overdrive. If he ignored the reports and simply let the agitator go on agitating, then who knows what could happen. The flames of religious fervor were easily stoked this time of year. There could be rioting in the streets. There might even be a full-scale revolt.

The result would be a swift and merciless crackdown by Rome, with many innocent people killed in the process. No matter how Caiaphas did the arithmetic, it always came out the same—better that one person should die than have an entire nation perish! I’m not sure what he had against Jesus personally; he was just being practical and taking care of business. If he wanted to keep his job, he needed to keep the peace.

The irony is that Jesus eventually reached the same conclusion—better for one to die so that everybody else can be spared. Only here’s the thing … Jesus’ death was not to keep the peace; it was to bring peace to us. For Caiaphas, it was “just business, nothing personal” … and for Jesus, it was all personal!

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Hymns vs. Praise Music

February 26, 2010
I'm not sure if anyone is going to read this since it has been 8 months since my last post, but I received an email with a funny and insightful comparison of hymns and praise music (found after my comments). This got me to thinking about music in worship. I took a class in seminary on congregational music and I learned a lot (because I didn't know much to begin with). I am not an expert on music or even congregational music, but I love to worship and I know that faithful worship takes many different forms. I grew up with traditional hymns. I am the pastor of a church that sings traditional hymns. I love traditional hymns. But I also attended youth at a Church of Christ Church that sang acapella. When I went to ACU, we sang hymns and praise songs acapella. The music was beautiful. When I went to Princeton, we sang hymns, praise songs, global songs, etc. We had everything from strings and horns to guitars and bongos, everything from cantors to hip-hop. In all of my experiences, I have found that each of these styles can be showy and stuffy or showy and shallow, but they can all be faithful forms of worship as well. Truth be told, it's not always the style, but the song that should be evaluated. There are great hymns and poor hymns, great praise songs and poor praise songs. Wouldn't it be great, if we could celebrate the creativity of our creator by singing the best songs for that service of worship, no matter what the style. Now I know that not all congregations are able to do multiple styles of worship (it's hard to find room for a drumset and an organ, but it wouldn't it be wonderful if we could all be more accepting of each other and multiple styles of worship. For those in my congregation, I am not suggesting that we change our style of music. What I am suggesting is that all of us strive to become more open to the movement of the Spirit and see how music in worship can help bring us closer to God and one another.

Here is the email I received:

Praise Songs explained...
Not long ago a farmer went to the city one weekend and attended the big city church. He came home and his wife asked him how it was. "Well," said the farmer, "It was good. They did something different, however. They sang praise choruses instead of hymns."
"Praise choruses," said his wife, "What are those?"
"Oh, they're okay. They're sort of like hymns, only different," said the farmer.
""Well, what's the difference?" asked his wife.
The farmer said, "Well it's like this - If I were to say to you:
`Martha, the cows are in the corn,' well that would be a hymn. If, on the other hand, I were to say to you:
`Martha Martha, Martha, Oh, Martha, MARTHA, MARTHA, the cows, the big cows, the brown cows, the black cows, the white cows, the black and white cows, the COWS, COWS, COWS are in the corn, are in the corn, are in the corn, are in the corn, the CORN, CORN, CORN,'
Then, if I were to repeat the whole thing two or three times, well that would be a praise chorus."
(author unknown - from an email circulated a few years ago)

Hymns explained...
A young, new Christian from the big city attended the small town church one weekend. He came home and his wife asked him how it was.
"Well," said the young man, "It was good. They did something different, however. They sang hymns instead of regular songs."
"Hymns," said his wife, "What are those?"
"Oh, they're okay. They're sort of like regular songs, only different," said the young man.
"Well, what's the difference?" asked his wife.
The young man said, "Well it's like this - If I were to say to you, `Martha, the cows are in the corn,' well that would be a regular song. If, on the other hand, I were to say to you:
Oh Martha, dear Martha, hear thou my cry Inclinest thine ear to the words of my mouth. Turn thou thy whole wondrous ear by and by To the righteous, inimitable, glorious truth.
For the way of the animals who can explain There in their heads is no shadow of sense, Hearkenest they in God's sun or his rain Unless from the mild, tempting corn they are fenced.
Yea those cows in glad bovine, rebellious delight, Have broke free their shackles, their warm pens eschewed. Then goaded by minions of darkness and night They all my mild Chilliwack sweet corn have chewed.
So look to that bright shining day by and by, Where all foul corruptions of earth are reborn. Where no vicious animal makes my soul cry And I no longer see those foul cows in the corn.
Then, if I were to do only verses one, three, and four and do a key change on the last verse, well that would be a hymn."
(author unknown - from an email circulated a few years ago)

Putting it all in perspective...
And He also told this parable to certain ones who trusted in themselves that their worship style was the only acceptable form:
Four men went up in to the temple to pray, two traditional music directors and two contemporary worship leaders.
One of the traditional music directors stood and was praying thus to himself, 'God, I thank Thee that I am not like many other church musicians: untrained, unrefined, undignified, or even like these contemporary worship leaders. I program only the finest art music; I present only those works truly worthy of Thee.'
One of the contemporary worship leaders was standing off to the other side, praying like this: 'O Lord, I thank You that I am not like many other church musicians: stuffy, inhibited, stuck in a rut of boring and irrelevant music of the past. I present only the very latest songs and reach people where they're at.'
In another corner the other traditional music director and the other contemporary worship leader were kneeling and praying together.
The traditional music director prayed: 'Lord God, You know how easily the striving for artistic excellence can become idolatrous. When I use my gifts, may I always remember that they come from Your hand, and that You delight in all of the genuine gifts of worship which Your children bring, in all of their variety.'
The contemporary worship leader prayed: 'God, I only know four chords on the guitar, and I am not a polished performer; but I thank You for Your grace in allowing me to come near in worship, and for the privilege in leading others to Your throne. Thank You for all the different ways that Your people can praise You.'
"I tell you, these last two went away with their offerings of worship received by the Lord, rather than the others; for God is not so much concerned with the style of the musical gifts you bring, as He is with the humility of heart and genuineness of love with which you bring them."

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